A Crash Course for Dad During Pregnancy

Women often prepare for pregnancy by reading literature, researching, and discussing with their friends before, during, and after the pregnancy.  Men, on the other hand, usually walk into a first pregnancy as clueless as T.J Watt at a dance recital.  To help, I’ve put together some common questions I often get from dads to help you understand more about your wife/significant other’s pregnancy.

Q: How can I help?

A: The first and most important thing I tell Dad is to be supportive!  Several reliable scientific studies prove that women who have a supportive partner have lower rates of preterm delivery and growth problems in babies.  There are many ways to be supportive.  Start by asking your loved one how you can help, and then follow through.

Q: How do you figure out a due date?

A: This is based on the women’s last menstrual period, or an early ultrasound exam.  Remember, a normal pregnancy is approximately 40 weeks after the first day of a women’s last menstrual period.

Q: What’s going on in the first trimester?

A: Most women will need much more rest than usual, so don’t be surprised by all the additional naps and early bed times.  Many women will unfortunately experience intense nausea and vomiting, at all times, not just in the morning, although, some women don’t experience any sickness.  Mood swings are also very common, and not just for future moms, but future dads too!

Q: What about the second trimester?

A: This is when most women feel the best during their pregnancy.  Most women will start to “show” around this time, will have increased energy, and usually the nausea and vomiting will subside.  Around 20 weeks (plus or minus a few), many women will start to feel the baby move as well, which can be a very exciting time!  Sorry dad, typically you can feel it much later than she does.

Q: And the third trimester?

A: Well get ready dad, this is usually when the future mom is the most uncomfortable.  Difficulty with sleeping and walking is very common.  Anxiety and nerves start to set in, although so does a new level of excitement.  All of these changes in emotions are perfectly normal!

Q: The most important question; can I have sex during pregnancy?

A: In short, yes.  There are some conditions that your OB/GYN will recommend it is unsafe to have intercourse, so if you are unsure, ASK.  But, generally speaking, sex is totally safe.  However, you will often have to try new positions as your partner’s belly gets bigger, and at times, it may be uncomfortable for your partner.

Q: How can you prepare for labor?

A: First, plan your hospital route: where is it located and how will you get there.  Take a tour if you can.  Get as familiar as possible with the hospital you will be going to.  Secondly, make sure you have a rear facing car seat installed.  Your baby can't leave the hospital without one.  I recommend visiting www.safecar.gov, as it has many tips on picking and installing a car seat.

And remember dads- you can ask questions at appointments too.  As always, it is encouraged that you discuss any concerns you have with your physician. 

Stay tuned for part 2 of a crash course!

-Brian Welsh